UPDATE: Naomi passed away as planned on January 31, 2023 with her loving family by her side.
“Naomi exited this world peacefully, surrounded by family, just before 6pm last evening.” said son-in-law Gord Gibb. “She was smiling, there was laughter (and tears, of course), and she was full of spit and vinegar right to the end. It was her ultimate victory, to go out on her own terms. And she never wavered in her decision, to her last breath. She was absolutely ready to go and eager to see what, and who awaited her on the other side.”
Gibb says she wore a nightie festooned with red cardinals that was purchased specifically for her exit and the next day something extraordinary happened.
“Just now, we looked out the window towards the canal and there were six cardinals on the tree closest to the deck, just outside the window. They stayed for about 10 minutes, then flew away…”
KAWARTHA LAKES-Naomi Le Masurier isn’t afraid of dying, she is afraid of suffering and what witnessing that would do to her family.
“I’m not scared, I’m at peace with this (dying). I would be frightened more if I was to live because the death I would be facing is not a good one.” Le Masurier told Kawartha 411 News. “A brain tumour is not a nice death.”
The 78-year-old was first diagnosed with a slow-growing brain tumour in 2000. She had surgery to remove part of the tumour and has spent the last 23 years living her life to the fullest.
She has two children, six grandchildren and four great-grandchildren. She and her husband Kenneth have been married for 58 years. Her 96-year-old mother lives at Adelaide Place in Lindsay.
“I’ve had a good life, I’ve had my challenges, I’ve lost two siblings already which was very hard. I’ve had lots of friends and lots of people in my life. I have a friend I started grade one with so she’s been in my life for over 70 years and I have lots of other friends I picked up along the way.” Le Masurier said. “I belong to a group that started off as a newcomers group after I moved to Lindsay. Â I’ve kept that group going because the lady across the street became my best friend. It’s now called the Sunshine Group, going on 30 years. I’m hoping some will be able to come to my Celebration of Life.”
Le Masurier says in early 2022 she noticed something happening with her vision and other health issues started popping up.
“I was getting ready to go visit my friend and I had a spell. I went to the emergency department and they did an MRI and found the tumour was going rogue, it was rapidly growing.”
Doctors told her the tumour was now wrapped around her optical nerve and carotid artery. Surgery isn’t possible, as it would cause a massive bleed and stroke and her throat would close up. A second opinion confirmed the prognosis. That’s when she decided to apply for Medical Assistance In Dying or MAID.
“It’s a big step but I feel it’s the right step and I’m really pleased that the MAID program is available so I can take part in it.” Le Masurier explained.
She says her Nurse Practitioner and two other Doctors interviewed her. One came to her house, the other was a video chat. She was approved for the program almost immediately. She says the whole process took only a few weeks.
“You have to give them a date upfront in case something happens to you and you become incapacitated. They can use that date to say you have consented,” she says.
Le Masurier chose January 31, 2023 as her last day on earth with a celebration of life happening the day before on January 30th.
“It’s emotional but these are people I have loved in my life, I have seen several of them since my decision but it’s a sharing time. I have the odd weepy time but mostly I am making the best of a very bad situation. I don’t want to put my family through having to look after me.”
Gord Gibb says Le Masurier is not your stereotypical mother-in-law. While the family accepts her decision, he says she will be missed.
“The stereotype is when the boy dates the girl and things are getting serious in the relationship, what do I do with the mother-in-law? How am I going to deal with her for 30-40 years, that’s the stereotype.” Gibb laughs. Â “At this point in time, I’ve been looking back on 30-plus years of a relationship with Naomi and I’ve only got a couple of days left with her and I’m panicking. She has been one of my best friends and advisors. Naomi is a rock, a clear thinker and she can see the path forward, generous to a fault and it doesn’t matter what trauma she has gone through with the surgeries and problems with her eyes, she went all through this and never missed a beat. In terms of family activities, she would host family gatherings, birthday parties retirement parties never missing a beat with incredible strength and determination.”
In 2021, there were 10,064 MAID provisions in Canada, bringing the total number of medically assisted deaths in Canada since it was legalized in 2016 to 31,664. The Canadian government says annual growth in MAID provision continues to increase steadily each year. The average age at the time MAID was provided in 2021 was 76.3 years. New legislation recently introduced MAID eligibility for individuals for whom death was not reasonably foreseeable, as long as they met all other eligibility criteria, including having a serious and incurable illness, disease or disability, being in an advanced state of irreversible decline in capacity, and experiencing enduring physical or psychological suffering that is intolerable to them and that cannot be relieved under conditions that they consider acceptable.
44.2% of MAID provisions took place in private residences in 2021, continuing to be the primary setting for the administration of MAID in Canada according to the government.
“You don’t need to be afraid of death.” Le Masurier says. “I want to open the whole subject up, I want to be an educator on this situation. I’m not afraid of death. I know there’s so much more for us after this.”
“All of us agree with it, not everyone is comfortable with it,” Gibb says. “Death is still very mysterious. If you are ill and terminally ill, you never know when death is going to come. MAID allows us to say goodbye and to celebrate the triumph to punch your own card and plan your own exit when circumstances make sense.”
And Le Masurier says the screening process is rigorous.
“With MAID the questions are designed so they know whether you are depressed or not. At first, you don’t know where they are coming from they have to find out whether you are depressed, there’s a good screening in place with MAID.”
While much of the process went smoothly, Le Masurier says there have been a few last-minute hiccups. She had originally planned to donate her body to science (as her father had done) so that experts could try to determine what caused her brain tumour and help others along the way. On Monday she was told that wouldn’t be possible due to the strict criteria.
“It’s been very important to me to donate my body and it’s been a real disappointment to me to find out I couldn’t. I wish they would have told me that six months ago.” Le Masurier explains.
She says you have to be under 6 feet tall, under 200 pounds and have a certain BMI and her BMI does not fit the criteria. She is now looking into being an organ donor.
She also found out on Monday that the scheduled time for her MAID has to be moved from 11 am to 5pm.
“That was a disappointment that also came on Monday. I had thought I would like to go around 11 o’clock in the morning.” Le Masurier said. Â “My hairdresser had kindly said she wanted to do my hair for the last time and I thought that would keep me busy until 11 and my children would be here. But my doctor can’t be here until 5 o’clock so I think what my day will probably look like is my children will be here, and we will go see my mom who is 96 and living at Adelaide Place for the last time and then we will come back home.” Le Masurier said while fighting back tears.
For family, the Celebration of Life will be a special time to let Le Masurier know how much she means to them.
“It’s going to be a wonderful day, Â we have a video tribute that will be shown and it will be a celebration of her life and her incredible contribution to her family and her community,” said Gibb. “Not many people get to hear their own eulogy. She knows how much we love her and her life matters. This gives her a chance to hear how much she has impacted us and how much we love her.”
The Celebration of Life Open House is on January 30, 2023, from 1:30 to 4:30 p.m. at her home, 31 South Bayou Rd, in Fenelon Falls.
“Thanks again to all the wonderful people Ken and I have had in our lives. You are much loved and respected. May your spirits soar!” she said.
